Episode 34: Shame-Based Spice Assessment

 


Part 1: Shame Versus Guilt

  • Tripped over a rabbit hole listening to a recent episode of the Ologies Podcast πŸ‡πŸ•³
  • Driving reflections on my grapples with & pursuit towards Self-Acceptance πŸ’©
  • I love a hot-f*ing-mess!... but apparently don't accept it quite as easily πŸ˜‡
  • The subtle nuance between guilt & shame πŸ€”

Part 2: Nature Versus Nurture

  • Why I don't experience guilt... 1) Make a decision, 2) Detach from the outcome... πŸ‘
  • Why self exploration is fun! πŸ˜…
  • The 'nature' of my shame (DNA-level)... I'm neuro-spicy! πŸ’₯
  • The 'nurture' of my shame (life-influence)... Good ol' fashioned trauma response! πŸ’£

Part 3: Adjusting the Spice Levels

  • The subjective and objective indications that I'm decidedly 'not normal' 😎
  • What I'm learning to appreciate is my ability to adjust my spice levels and hone my powers for good, which helps me accept myself and shift away from the shame πŸ’–



Episode 33: The Mirror Test


Part 1: An Interesting Observation

  • The 'Oh Shit' moment of observing old dysfunctional behaviours in someone else, and discerning the best course of action 😯
  • Being the 'bigger person' but also being honest & showing compassion for both of us, past and present πŸ™
  • Acknowledgement of the WORK I've done, and which I rarely give myself credit for... but not expecting that from others πŸ‘

Part 2: Disappointing Diagnosis

  • "You're perfectly healthy, just anxious"... i.e. The only thing wrong with me, is that I think there's something wrong with me, a fun throwback to the Episode that landed me the last allocated label πŸ˜…πŸ€”
  • This Doc unknowingly validated my recent Experimental results as well as the aforementioned Mirror Test observations; another opportunity to celebrate my self discovery adventure, recognising that my routines, while highly disciplined, are my expression of authentic self-care πŸ₯³πŸ’ͺπŸ‡

Episode 32: Compassionate Experimentation


Part 1: Experimental Kindness & Criticism

  • As foreshadowed in Part 3 of Self-Love Vs. Self-Acceptance Summer's Summary, I leant into my natural inclinations as a scientist to play with emotional concepts πŸ˜…πŸ˜Ά
  • Probing positive beliefs about self criticism and negatives beliefs about self compassion with sharp pointy sticks πŸ‘ˆ 
  • Authentic confusion about what's 'most kind' and getting primal to gain some clarity; bringing it back to the SCARF Model & comparing myself to my pet goat 🧣🐐
  • The truly subtle difference is self-kindness versus self-care... versus self-indulgence & self-sabotage; What the hell is actual Self Care?! πŸ’–πŸ’©

Part 2: The More You Know

  • Justice; when life gives you lemons... be a dick to yourself and others? πŸ‹πŸ–•
  • Spite-ful or Grate-ful, a reminder of resentment's poisonous nature πŸ§ͺ😑
  • A disciplined epiphany, the mind-numbing impacts of confirmation bias & the power of INTENTIONπŸ’‘πŸ’₯
  • Being hard on myself about not being able to be hard on myself... the sign of a true existentialist πŸ˜…

Part 3: In Conclusion

  • The dark side of acceptance? πŸ€”
  • It's all about BALANCE and respecting each other's differences and unique pivot points
  • To live my authentic Values, in a truly compassionate way, requires self-responsibility & accountability, but it's not a license for punishment... 
  • My two critical check points, implemented courtesy of this compassionate experimentation πŸ’–
    • What is my Intention? [Am I expecting too much? Am I aligned to my preferred definition of Compassion?]
    • Am I accepting my true & genuine Self? [Sans 'shoulds'/'coulds'/shame/judgments]

Summer's Summary: Self-Love Vs. Self-Acceptance


Link to Original: Self-Love Vs. Self-Acceptance (Published 26 November 2020)

Part 1: Main Points & Reflections

  • I seem to easily forget shit I once learned. πŸ˜…
  • Self acceptance as a choice?🀷‍♀️
  • Supposed subconscious rejection of kindness & finding gratitude in life's rough waters. 🌊.

Part 2: Mindful Anarchy, Take Two

  • I deserve kindness, not hot-mess-ness. Respectful & mindful disagreement with old, habitual and unhelpful beliefs, & a budding resistance to 'shoulding' myself. πŸ–•πŸ™
  • Opting for a more WHOLE-istic approach & ditching the Blame Game. πŸ‘ˆπŸ’–


Part 3: What Does This Look Like Now? 

  • Timely article to revisit current struggles and the concept of self-love, aka compassion. Leaning into self-help resources, and here's a great one! πŸ₯³ 
  • A compassion definition that resonates, very understandable compassion barriers, and a fun & compassionate experimentation! πŸ€“
  • Ironically, I discovered one way to appreciate and accept my brain on a deeper level was to break it and make it bleed. πŸ’₯🧠



Episode 31: How Am I Not Myself?

 

Link(s) to Related Vlogs: Pity Versus Compassion

Link(s) to Related Articles: The Blame GameGood Enough, Who The Hell Just Said That?!

 Photos & Videos

Palmy & Mighty Manawatu πŸŒΏπŸ’–

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Episode 30: Homegrown Reflections

 


Part 1: Atypical Irony

Part 2: Vietname & Existential Tooth Fairies
Link to Previous Podcast Mentioned: The Tale of Twyla Tooth

Part 3: Spiritual Spookiness

 Photos & Videos

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Episode 29: Swan Song



Part 1: General Update

   Part 2: The Fall

              Part 3: The Literal Mind Numbing Diagnosis

Part 4: Bewildering, Humbling & Annoying Support
Link to Relevant Vlog: Family Values

Part 5: Learnings & Silver Linings


 Photos & Videos

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Episode 28: Homesick & Humoured




Photos & Videos

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Bulletproof

 


Bouncing Back From Disappointment

For More on the Curly Components of Emotional Intelligence, Read The Snake Pit πŸπŸ’–