The Fool

How does one recognise themselves in a mirror? Is it by joy or is it by fear?

What do we think when we look into our eyes? Who governs the behaviour, Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde?

Do we percieve ourselves as other people do? Or do we find a Saint where others see a Fool?

A Fool I'd rather be, beacuse I cannot pretend... I find it odd this life, I'd rather not have to continually defend.

Taranaki

No extraordinary day, simply driving up to the Waikato for a leadership workshop in one of the company's many reliable hybrids. 

A twist in the road takes me up to a viewpoint that brings tears to my eyes; the powerful sea to the left and brilliantly green sheep-strewn hilly farmland to the right fills my heart with gratitude. 

Since moving to Taranaki I’m no stranger to these emotional eruptions of thankfulness. Its vast beauty and formidable mountain invokes a mysterious sense of belonging and protection which befuddles me. 

This magical place that has begun to heal the one hundred years of hurt I’ve crammed into thirty-three years of life. 

As I continue into the Waitomo district signs remind me that the Naki will miss me and looks forward to welcoming me back. 

As my tears deepen I hear myself say “How did I get so f&$#ing lucky.” 💖🐇🏔

Our gorgeous Maunga Taranaki as viewed from Lake Dive to the South. Fantham's Peak in the foreground, Mt. Taranaki's summit behind and to the North.

Becoming

I did not kill her, but she died.
At times peacefully, at times fighting, petrified.

I see them, and they see me.
I am not who they knew, how could I be?

Years ago I was different, same as yesterday.
Thoughts and emotions, each cell shifts everyday.

No, I did not kill her, but compost she did become.
Her death was a gift, flying, flowing, to freedom.

Stay

Stay, stay; don’t run away

i didn't believe in what i deserve, so i led myself astray

Be brave enough to say that I am this way


i cannot learn patience until I pause long enough to see

That I am magic, I was born to be me

Free

Change

Tomorrow, look not for the season of today.

Tomorrow, today's concerns fertilise new growth.

Tomorrow, hard-wiring softens.

Tomorrow, mindsets permissively shift.

Tomorrow, action replaces reaction.

Tomorrow, resisting innate evolution is of no interest.

Today, I gave gratitude to who I was because tomorrow I cease to exist.

Tomorrow, I am free.
 

Worth

I'm a runner, yes it's true;
But does anyone wonder where I'm running to?

I run forward, I never go back;
Still, somedays I really miss my little cat.

She lives with her Dad now, we all know what it's like;
I got her for him, I thought it would stop the fights.

But the fight was inside me, it was never going to stop;
Until that fateful day when I completely lost the plot.

It was never about him, it was all about me;
I was trapped inside my head, fighting to break free.

Since then I've changed so much, it feels as though I've experienced rebirth;
The fights have all but ceased, I finally feel my worth.

Taranaki

It's Mountain Protects Me
It's Seas Humble Me
It's People Support Me
It's Rainbows Inspire Me
It's Bush Heals Me

Taranaki Teaches Me to Love

Trust

i close my eyes and I See
i am silent and I Speak Volumes
i throw away and I Bring Abundance
i react selfishly and I Act Selfless 

i blame and I Forgive
i feel heavy with fear and I am Light with Peace
i detach and I Connect 

i go within and I Radiate Out
i believe and I Know

The Runner

All my life I've been this way; when things get tough I refuse to stay. 

I shift searching for comfort and content; a change to heal the pain is my sole intent.  

But though it takes time my new found happiness begins to slow; the anxiety and unease follow me wherever I go. 

New school, new State, new job, new Country, new love; this has to be it, I pray to Anyone above. 

Yet it's me alone who needs to learn to be happy; and not allow my Heart, Head or feet twicht when I start to feel crappy. 

It's hard to accept that my expectations are too high; things will not always be easy but that's not a reason to fly. 

My search is over, here is where I will remain; things will not always be perfect but I refuse to run again.

The Choice

A hurt lion is dangerous.
A jealous lion is dangerous.
A playful lion is dangerous.
A hungry lion is dangerous. 
A scared lion is dangerous.
A happy lion is dangerous.
A confused lion is dangerous. 

An ordinary lion does not realize the danger it poses, it is only being a lion.
An aware Lion can choose when being dangerous is wise, and understands the responsibility of its inherent power.